On social media

<a video that does it for me

I've always wanted to quit social media. For different reasons that has evolved with time. It started off as a way to be more productive during exam periods, then progressed so as to curb my constant need for attention (which, is more complex than just good feelings after getting attention. it's like an addiction with a whole lot of psychology behind it).

And I've deactivated my FB for so many times, deleted social media apps from my phone all to find myself going back to it again. I used to not understand why, i mean i want to quit but physiologically?! I couldnt.  Maybe it's also due to the mind-heart disconnection where my mind says to disconnect while my heart secretly yearns for it.

Now after watching the video, I think this time--might be it.

Also, I've realised that actually for the past few months, I am veryyy less dependent on social media. I post lesser, I don't see every Snap/ Insta story, I don't check instagram from end to end... And this life of not checking what my friends are up to, seems more peaceful. Especially in this age where I'll easily get FOMO.

Also, I realised that I should work on the REAL things. Like my moral values, my thoughts, faith, actual real life skills etc... Maybe by reading more on religion? HAHA. Or talking to people, or thinking, or drawing. AND listening to John Green's podcasts.

I don't know why there's this habit to me like I want to do my best at everything. Even with social apps like an Instagram feed. But it is not important at all. This pseudo-image that we craft of ourselves. Like Ning said, "there is no way to be completely real online".

Rest assured, me quitting social media won't hinder my love of documenting memories. I'll still document my life, but in a different, less damaging way.

How do intimate real life relationships work?

Really feel like doing things the old fashioned way. Get a flip phone, a film camera and a second hand i-pod. Stash them into a tote bag. And go on an adventure. Alone, or with someone you love.

<---HOW ROMANTIC.